This Poetry Habit

is more journal than skill,
more inward than blog,
and it’s nice to have a record.

The days on which I do not poem, fine, very well, it didn’t happen today;
but if I go a month, that is a poem as well.

Maybe it is the despair of all the words, tasks, responsibilities, obligations, must, should, ought, could, would, will, expectation, deliberation piling on me in fast-paced attack on my sensibilities and sleep —

Or it is the despair of silence. No words, not even self.

On One Short-Sleep Night in August

I breathe in Peace,
I breathe out Gratitude.
I breathe in Peace,
I breathe out Generosity.
I breathe in Peace,
I breathe out Love of more Love.
I breathe in Peace,
I breathe out a blanket of touch or of snow to still the inner voice.
I breathe in Peace,
I breathe out Self-Reliance.
I breathe in Peace,
I breathe out Open-Handedness.
I breathe in Peace,

Nope.
This is gonna take more than breathing.

Every Other Monday Morning

is trash and recycling day,
and it’s quite early,
and I am the only one obligated to be up by a certain time but not out the door,
so the trash and recycling are my job.

I cheat and drive the bins up the steep drive.

But going outdoors means that the dogs wish to get involved,
but usually the car is too packed with bins for them to be inside the car,
but I would be frozen with worry that they were too close to the car to safely run along beside it,
but this week there was room.

What I am trying to say is that Sgiobalta knows that she can no longer jump up into the back seat and she waits patiently for me to lift her.
What I am trying to say is that she even knows that she can no longer hop down from the back seat
and she waited for me to lift her,
and I scooped up by the rough and the hips.

She laid her head trustingly on my shoulder and sighed a memory-filled sigh of resignation.

There are pretty words,

she said,
and then there’s poetry.

There are pretty words which capture intense feeling exquisitely,

and then there’s poetry.

I suppose that I am a child of the seventies, still believing that my words are worth writing down and calling poetry.

They make sense in my head. They make sense when I hear them aloud in my head. The pretty words give voice to pieces of my heart that I can’t show otherwise and I thought that was poetry but perhaps it is just journaling. In public. Hmmm. If I threw in some random line breaks, that wouldn’t help either.

It’s true. I am someone’s great aunt.
And great aunts who write poetry are definitely a thing.
And the poetry of great aunts is cringe worthy
(and out of sync with the world, but that’s all right).
Fact: my great-niblings are truly delightful people whom I am glad to know and whom I am glad to count as mine.

Conclusion: it is a privilege to write great-aunt-poetry
and to put the pretty words in an order that pleases me
and shows a little of my heart.

Called

Woken from first sleep,
I could not tell the source of gentle light,
dawn or night-shiner,
Until, dog-enabled, I stood at the door and moon-sharp shadows
Quickened my heart.

Then I stepped outside and gasped.

The Hunter.

Right there.

Right here in my eye, his good dogs accompanying him as well,
Brighter than the moon;
Right here, answering my restlessness
With unwavering surety;
Right here in my heart.

Yes.

I am heading back outdoors now,
and if I do not return, inquire of the stars.

Sirius

Brightest in my sky just now,
I stepped out to see if he were Jupiter
But, no, there glittered his Hunter above.

Enough mist blocks out the small stars
And throws my shining ones into relief:
Hunter, faithful Hounds, Twins, The Bull with glittering red eye and Mars caught on his horn.

Thank You.

Orion

Glittered clear in the sky, low in the southeast,
The dogs not yet caught up to him.

It was so sweet to see him after nights and nights of overcast.

But it meant I was up at two:something.
So, lovely, but I did not exactly savor it.

My Girl Sgiob

Had a very hurty leg last spring.
And she’s an old gal and a surgery was not recommended.

So we healed, low and slow,
and painful
and my heart broke.

Yesterday she knew to let me lift her up into the car and back down to earth as we drove to our neighbor’s to mow her lawn.

But daily things are fine. Creaky, but fine.
This morning, she full-speed chased a squirrel.

All is well.